especially after cancer, i have had a huge desire to connect with people. sometimes it has been great for me. other times it has caused big troubles in my life.

seems like i am always lonely. no matter how many people are around me. yesterday i must have received 50 emails to my cellphone. i guess i am so lucky.

having cancer changed my mind in so many ways. it was a very deep and profound experience.

Went to my gig tonight. I got there just in time to start the first set at 7pm. Today was "pay-day" so, after the 1st set I went to the cashiers office to pick up my money. Actually, I was to pick up money for the last "pay-day" also. I was on a tour this month and was late sending the invoice for the first "pay-day" on October 8. So...I was understanding about not being paid on October 8 (even though I have been working there over 2 years and the "girl" in the office knows the situation very well).

So...the cashier told me there wasn't ANY money at all for me. So, now they owe me money for both "pay-days"...October 8 and October 30. I went into the kitchen and was waiting to hear something from the management. Management said there wasn't any money for me tonight. So, I said, "Well....I told you before, no money, no music."

Well, the clock was ticking. It became 8pm. Time for the 2nd stage. I was still in the kitchen. The management was making many phone calls....many calls to staff and management at home on Sunday night. Customers were waiting. The management is beginning to panic. They asked me to play and I said, "No way! I'm going home!!! You keep your half of the "deal" and I will keep mine". Suddenly about 8:20pm an envelope arrived with my money. Surprise surprise!!! I guess there was money there after all........

Don't misunderstand. I'm not in the music business for the money. If I wanted to make huge money, I would go back to West Virginia and broker lumber. I love making music. I show up on time. Try to look good. Try to play my butt off every night. Have great interactions with the customers. But.....when I have an agreement, I expect the other side to respect it. It's simple. I'm not trying to be a hard ass. But I can be. So the message is simple...........

no money....no music

Since the first day I arrived in Japan, I have really been enjoying Japanese food. Tastes great and is soooo healthy!

when standing on the north pole, which way is north......?

On one of my recent visits home, my Dad and I went to visit one of the sawmills he continues to "broker" lumber for. He has been one of the biggest lumber brokers on the east coast for over 30 years. It is a fast moving, unbelievably competitive and high-risk business. There are no "formal" places to learn how to be a lumber broker. I had the priviledge of learning this business directly from my Dad. Although, I didn't continue in the lumber business, so much of what he taught me, I've been able to use in the music business. I am so lucky to have had that expereience.

Every year about this time, I dip down into a depression. It's been happening for so many years, I don't even know when it actually started. I remember 5 or 6 years ago, the depression was almost paralyzing. I remember being on the train, going to the Shinjuku Pit Inn to do a gig and really thinking about not going. I couldn't imagine that I would be able to play anything at all. I had similar feelings this week but, was able to play Sunday, Monday and Wednesday nights. I feel like I can play at my best level now, while being in the middle of terrible depression. Depression is so misunderstand. It's a huge breakthrough for me to be able to play my best while having a serious bout with depression. In the past, I usually let everything go....unpaid bills...bad diet....too much sleep...no sleep...no trumpet practice...no sex...too much sex...spending all of my money..etc. It even cost me my marriage, kids, house, cars, etc.

I remember calling Jimmy a few years ago after I was told to leave a jazz club in Ginza for no apparent reason. Jimmy told me, "Mannnn, when you walk into play the gig, if you don't feel any love then just turn around and go home. Don't EVEN get the horn out cause there isn't going to be any meaningful music made in that space."

I've been living in Tokyo for 7 years now (can't believe it...neither can my son or daughter). Occassionally, I take a look at JAZZLIFE and SWINGJOURNAL magazines (I don't know why, I always get depressed later). I think these are the 2 most popular "jazz" magazines in Japan. They seem to do a pretty good job of covering the "local" Tokyo/Japan scene...at least in terms of the Japanese musicians and the really famous musicians from NY/LA and Europe that visit here. However, I've NEVER seen ANY coverage (interviews/reviews/photos) of the foreign musicians that live in Tokyo or other parts of Japan. It's like we don't exist. Like we are invisible. One time I saw Tommy Campbell's picture in JAZZLIFE because he happened to be on a concert with some FAMOUS Japanese musicians. I see Marcus Miller on the cover of JAZZLIFE about every other month or when they don't have Michael Brecker, Joshua Redman or Pat Metheny on the cover. When Marcus used to come to town, he used to go to Pickford in Roppongi to hang-out and jam. I've never heard any mention of any of the "cats" from Pickford in the magazines, even though George Duke, Brian McKnight, Stevie Wonder and others used to routinely drop-in to Pickford.) It's kind of amazing to me how you can ignore a whole segment of the music scene like these magazines have done. I think it actually must take some effort. But, it's ok. I don't need these mags or the record companies. I'm building my "thing" one happy listener at a time. It might take me a while longer but, that's ok. I'm patient. I never hear anyone mention what I'm talking about today. That's also interesting to me. It's like there is this context set-up that excludes us and we just buy into it and trot along like little sheep to our next "event" gig. Not i..........

From time to time I find myself in the company of very determined and intense public nose-pickers on the train here in Tokyo. Usually guys but, from time to time I've witnessed some women with their index fingers buried to the 2nd knuckle sitting across from me on the train. I guess I can excuse emergency situations. Come on, let's be honest. We've all had to do a little landscape work from time to time. But, what amazes me about these nose-pickers is that they go "back in" repeatedly...sometimes 15 or 20 times. Deep, intense excavation. And then switching to the other side, all the while building up a huge pile of residue on the resting hand. After the digging is finished, watch out! Because then they do "the roll" (rolling it into a ball) and then "the flick" (flinging their trophy somewhere nearby on the train). Tonight, I encounter my first ear-picker. I had a 12 minute train ride from Kami-Itabashi to Ikebukuro and he was hard at work the entire time. I got off the train in Ikebukuro so I'm sorry to say I had to miss the "the roll" and "the flick".

Did a little gig tonight at a small club in the west Ikebukuro area of Tokyo. It was my first time to play with guitarist Shinobu Ito. He has just returned from living in New York for 30 years. It was great to hear him and make music together. I can tell he has been living in the USA for a long time. He has that "thing" in his sound that you don't hear much in Tokyo. Although there are some technically good players here, they don't have that "thing" in their sound. Shinobu has it. I just hope he doesn't lose it after being here for a while. For those of you that don't live in Tokyo, I mentioned that the gig was in Ikebukuro. Ikebukuro has traditionally been labeled a "dangerous" area of Tokyo by most Japanese. There are a lot of foreigners (especially asian) in Ikebukuro and some mafia activity. Ikebukuro kind of has a New York "vibe". There are some "famous" jazz clubs in Tokyo that I haven't been able to do gigs in, unless I'm connected with somebody "famous". So, I do most of my jazz club gigs around the Ikebukuro area. I've been welcomed by most of the clubs in Ikebukuro. The Ikebukuro clubs don't have that sterile, snubbish attitude about jazz like some of the other places. They have more soul...more earthy...more real. At this gig tonight, people were clapping along with us, yelling at phrases they enjoyed and even getting up and dancing on some of the tunes. That would NEVER happen at a lot of clubs around Tokyo. So, the gig tonight wasn't at a "famous" place. In fact, there are probably less than 10 musicians in Tokyo that even know about the place. However, I accomplished my mission, which was to have the band enjoy themselves and to have the customers enjoy themselves. The rest I leave for others to deal with.

As I continue to read, "How The Moon Effects You", I am amazed at some of the situations I've had just in the past 24 hours. What do you think? Does the moon have anything to do with our moods/behavior? I can't help but think so. I notice that a lot of unusual events and communications seem to come my way in waves. I know we are nearing the end of a full moon phase now. Wow! The last 24 hours has been amazing. Maybe it's not connected. Maybe it's just another one of my stupid/crazy ideas. Anyone out there have any ideas on the effects of the moon?

I have started with another new addiction. Soy Milk. I go to Starbucks at SATY near Tobu-Nerima Station everyday. I'm slowly starting to get away from coffee. There is a lot of good information on the "net" regarding the health benefits of soy milk.

Starbucks Soy Milk

I wonder why music schools continue to graduate piano majors year after year without giving them the ability to tune their own instruments. I go to gigs and see guitarists, drummers, saxophonists, etc. tuning their instruments. Why is piano tuning not required for pianists in every music school? Wouldn't it make life easier for pianists to be able to tune a piano before a gig? And wouldn't it make life much easier for bands that have to endure out of tune pianos through entire gigs? I played a gig for 3 months, 7 nights a week at the New York Bar (Park Hyatt Hotel) in Tokyo this year. They tuned the piano only 1 or 2 times in three months (only after we begged, demanded, etc). They said it's too expensive to tune the piano. Back in good 'ole West Virginia it costs me $45 to get the piano tuned. Anyway, it seems like a lot of problems could be avoided if music schools properly prepared musicians to operate in the "real" world.

I'm working tonight with a great pianist and an incredibly creative person. Recently, Tom has completed the filming of his new movie, Turkey Boy. Check out his website!!!
Tom Pierson's Official Website

I'm interested to know the effects of the moon on the body and the mind. I started reading a book this week, "HOW THE MOON AFFECTS YOU" by Arnold L. Lieber, M.D.

I have over 500 CD's on my iPod now. But, recently I've been listening to:

Bobby McFerrin....Heaven's Desire
Brian McKnight....From There To Here
Chick Corea....Light As A Feather
Clark Terry....Live At E.J's
Eric Benet....True To Myself
George Duke....Face The Music
Herbie Hancock....The New Standard
Joe Henderson....Double Rainbow
Keith Jarrett....The Out Of Towners
Luther Vandross....Live At Radio City Music Hall
Marcus Miller....Tales
Pepper Adams....Motor City Scene

A few years ago, a counselor friend of mine told me (not news to me) that I had kind of an obsessive/compulsive streak. haha....while touring a couple of weeks ago, I was really into egg salad sandwiches and peach jello that I could buy anytime at convenience stores here in Japan. This new almond-choco-cheerio ice cream bar is my latest addiction. Bought 3 of them the other day. Went to bed early (unusual) a few nights ago and woke-up at 5am...hungry. Had to walk to the store and pick-up a couple of these bars. My passion for this bar will end soon..that's my pattern.

well.....adjusting to being back in tokyo after having 10 wonderful days touring japan. i live and work in tokyo but......i enjoyed nagoya, kobe, hiroshima and kagawa sooooo much. i can't wait to get back out "on the road". i'll be doing a tour from november 16 - december 6 with teddy kinjo's band. i'm already working on another east/west unit tour for early 2006.

where is the nipple on the chicken breast?

Recently, as I listen to the news (usually CNN), I constantly hear broadcasters asking "experts" if we (the US government) are prepared for the next big disaster. I think by now, the answer should be fairly obvious. NO...we aren't ready. And I wouldn't expect it anytime soon. Maybe it's poor organizational skills. But, I also think some of these events are so big that you just can't really prepare. So, why keep asking the question???

We finished our tour today with a great concert at the Yokohama Jazz Festival. I thought there might be a few dozen people come out to hear us play. But, when we walked out on to the stage I saw that it was standing room only. I was so surprised. It was really a treat for me to play with Hakuei, Jeff and Masashi. Today these guys played with so much passion and creativity. During the week, I would stand off to the side of the bandstand and watch and listen to these guys. I was amazed how everybody grew individually and as a group in only about 10 days. I just couldn't believe it.

Tonight we finished our trip to Kagawa with a LIVE in Takamatsu at Speak Low. It was a great club and we played to a full house. Everybody seemed to have a great time. We played a really slow r&b kind of groove and we got a chance to hear Jeff, Hakuei and Masahi do a little singing.

We did a jazz workshop this afternoon, followed by a concert. It was a great time. There were several musicians there that joined us for the workshop and later in the concert.

We stayed at Mr. Miyazaki's house for a couple of days while we were in Shikoku. This is a very special place with wonderful "energy". I had some of my best "ki" sessions ever at this location. Miyazaki-san is a great shakuhachi player. On Friday we took a lot of naps, ate udon, went to an onsen and listened to hours and hours of music while having some great sake.

We are crossing from Okayama to Shikoku Island. Today is our first day-off.

Hiroshima-One of my very favorite places in Japan. I've played in Hiroshima 3 times. I've really enjoyed all 3 performances. Also, one of my favorite clubs is in Hiroshima. The club is called SOHO. It's just has a great vibe for creating. Completely different than what I encountered the night before. Also, my favorite tenor sax player in Japan plays at SOHO almost everynight. His name is Shimizu and he is a badddddd dude on the tenor. I can't wait to go back there!!!

Tonight we played at Royal Horse in Osaka. A lot of famous jazz musicians have played at this club. At least from all the photos they had displayed outside in the front windows, it looks like many "famous" musicians have been playing there. It became clear pretty early on in this gig how un-famous I am. At least that's how I was made to feel. But, the band played it's ass off tonight. After the first set, the manager approached me and said that our original compositions were beautiful BUT. He wanted us to play standards. During the break I walked outside...kind of disgusted to have the management approach me like that. So, I walked up the street...decided to go the corner store and get some juice. As I was entering the store, I had a hooker approach me...got in the store and had a guy standing beside me filling his pockets with "genki" drinks...walked outside and had a guy throwing up all over the sidewalk in front of me while his "salaryman" friends stood around laughing at him. All that in about 2 minutes. Went back to the club and we proceeded to play our butts off on the "STANDARDS". Customers loved it...even wanted an encore.

We played at Big Apple in Kobe on October 4. It was an interesting, little basement space. It's the kind of club you can play anything you want. The master played a lot of cd's for us that had been recorded there. It was a great mix of music. The audience was very small but, we had a good time.

On October 3 we played at a new club in Nagoya called DOXY. It was a very nice place and the management was especially nice. Around the corner from DOXY is GARY'S. A lot of my frinds from Tokyo (PICKFORD) are playing at GARY'S every night. I saw Keith Haines, David King, Keven Bittle, Styxx and T. It was so nice to jam with those cats again. Recently, they have been touring and backing up Mary J. Blige, Ashnti, BOA and others.

Tonight we played our 2nd performance of the tour at SPATS in Odawara. The owner and his wife are great people and treated us with so much kindness. We met a lot of musicians from Odawara and teachers in the school system. We startesd the tour last in Yokohama at a club called Airegin. It's one of my very favorite places to perform music.